SET LIST SEVENTEEN (17)

1 Point of Reference…………...183

2 Cello

3 That's That…………………..184

4 Beware of the Snoogins

5 Dot Dot Space……………...185

6 Flyswatter of Love…...188

7 Times Up………………..189

8 Sunday Morning Sex…...190

9 Behave…………………...….191

10 Spreading the Word

11 Tired…………………..192

12 Actress

13 Empty Room……………...193



POINT OF REFERENCE

You keep waiting for your eyes to meet

Two lives become instantly changed forever

Sometimes you believe that day may come today

Other times you think to yourself never


That’s why god made the Russians black

Or maybe white depending on your preference

That’s why when I go out I’m never looking back

Because by now I’ve lost all point of reference


Ha ha ha…

(My plan worked to perfection)


I was feeling stranded and left

By the side of the road

Only seeking tranquility

And a place to call home


Until we met when I said,

“Meow baby, you wanna go roaming with me?”

You see, I’m just another aimless cat

Strolling back from combing the alley


But you and me, we could leave…

Help cure each other’s disease…

We could become great friends or family

Hell, we could even get married





CELLO

I’m a one night show…Yeah…

I’m a one man band…Oh

Sometimes I glow…ya know…

And some nights don’t go

as they were planned…

Why’d you just let go of my hand?


Ahh…So you think you know

Where all this is going?

Please, won’t you understand?

It was a trap and I was unknowing:


You’ve come across a desperate man

Yet you wanna sink my battle ship

Without seeing the battle plans

All because of one false radar blip

One wrong ding in your quick scan


I needed to silence this silence

Won’t you please bring in the violins

And the fellow who plays the cello

And won’t you kindly say hello

To all the people in the lobby

Who all told me I needed a better hobby


Better than telling all the citizens

That I’m mostly a dissident

Who doesn’t trust institutions

That mainly pitch pollution

Not to all the gentry and worldly citizens

But mostly to just the Americans


I’m a one night show…Yeah…

I’m a one man band…Oh

Sometimes I glow…ya know…

And some nights don’t go

as they were planned…

Why’d you just let go of my hand?


THAT’S THAT

Well, hey baby…

I know you’d love to lick my soul

With those eyes full of fire

Burning out of control


But you know me

I’m the one you can’t have

Because life is unfair

Oh, don’t let it get you sad


Just enjoy these dreams….

They are all you’ll ever have

Cause I’m a sexy young thing….

And you’re you….and that’s that!


BEWARE OF THE SNOOGINS

I said beware of the snoogins

— yeah, yeah

You said you knew what you were doing

— yeah, yeah


Your mistakes are far from

few and in between in

Sometimes you give the word

fu%&ed up a whole meaning!


You say I'm hurting myself

I say better than

hurting someone else


Oh oh you make a little lovin'

Ah ah bun in the oven

Uh oh splish splash, get fat

Uh uh dumpster baby in the trash


Oh oh drive to the pier

Uh uh all your problems disappear

Uh oh daughter in the water

Uh uh son added to the slaughter


These crazy kids today...

They don't know what they're doing

They're killing themselves...

each other.... And lives are being ruined


Mom and dad are too busy working

To know son Johnny is a real f*&%^@g jerk

and... It's just more time on this rhyme

That I got to spend working


Poor, poor teacher

Stuck with problem child Billy

What the little boy needs is some attention

Instead he gets slapped silly


I said beware of the snoogins — yeah, yeah

You said you knew what you were doing — yeah, yeah

Your mistakes are far from few and in between in

Sometimes you give the word fu%&ed up a whole meaning!


You say I'm hurting myself

I say better than hurting someone else

Oh oh Ah ah Uh oh Uh uh

you make a little lovin'

bun in the oven

splish splash

get fat

dumpster baby in the trash...


DOT DOT SPACE B

I've finally decided

to give you a piece of my mind

You've taken up another hour

of my precious time


Even printed it in Braille

'cause you can be so blind

Now I'll dictate it to you

one paragraph at a time





Bold face

Dot space

Lower case

Dot dot space


Dot dot

dot dot space

Dot dot

Double space


Bold face

Dot dot space

Lower case

Dot dot

dot dot dot - oops


Back space

Bold face

Dot dot space

Dot double space


Lower case

Dot dot

dot dot

Single space

Dot dot space


Thought I could make it through

this but I know that I cannot

Feelings I once embraced

are now tying me in a knot


Used to live to see your face

when my blood boiled red hot

The light in your eyes has been dwindling

at this same familiar pace


Bold face

Dot space

Lower case

Dot dot space


Dot dot

dot dot space

Dot dot

Double space


Bold face

Dot dot space

Lower case

Dot dot

dot dot dot - oops


Back space

Bold face

Dot dot space

Dot double space






Lower case

Dot dot

dot dot

Single space

Dot dot space


I've given you everything I've got

and that's a lot

We were once a team

but now it seems I'm your mascot


I guess I've always known

that we were at best a long shot

Two hearts once burned

but there's no more kindling in the fireplace


Bold face

Dot space

Lower case

Dot dot space


Dot dot

dot dot space

Dot dot

Double space


Bold face

Dot dot space

Lower case

Dot dot

dot dot dot - oops


Back space

Bold face

Dot dot space

Dot double space


Lower case

Dot dot

dot dot

Single space

Dot dot space


You've become my brace

and all the good times we've shared I've forgot

I was going to write more

but it's best that I ought not


So I'll leave you

with this very last forget-me-not

I fell for you,

we fell in love

and then we fell from grace


Bold face

Dot space

Lower case

Dot dot space





Dot dot

dot dot space

Dot dot

Double space


Bold face

Dot dot space

Lower case

Dot dot

dot dot dot - oops


Back space

Bold face

Dot dot space

Dot double space


Lower case

Dot dot

dot dot

Single space

Dot dot space


FLY SWATTER OF LOVE

As my eyes stayed glued to the door

And the stairs that you'll walk up no more

A great pain it rang through my ears

If I cried out there'd be nobody left who cares


After getting the latest

message that you sent me

Yes, this I must confess

My chessboard was empty


Your silence sang to me in memory

like the newly fallen rain

Yet the pawn moves along

knowing it's only part of the game


As I left alone that night on the train

Simply no longer able to explain

That the vision I once saw of us

No longer looked the same


As inaudible words dribbled

Down the side of my face

I wondered what I was still doing

In this crazy place?


It seems the wine in my glass

I could no longer taste

My fears weren't in haste

This was all a big mistake


A butterfly in a web

Inside this cocoon I'm encased

A mugged man in Central Park

Without any bear spray or mace


Still sometimes inside my mind

You lay naked on the rug

As I come closer you extend

Your arms out for a hug

As I approach I fall in the hole

That you freshly dug...

I got squashed by

the fly swatter of love

just like a bug


TIMES UP

My misdirected passion

Has led to many lashes

Put all my eggs in one basket

As if you even had to ask it


I made a rash decision

And did something I wish I didn’t

Now everything is broken

All black with ash and smoking


As I’ve lost all intention and desire

To ever again go near or play with fire

I know I’ve said this all before

But this time I won’t be called a liar


I don’t wanna feel

Like love’s not real

But I’ve grown sick and tired


Of being used

And if it’s self-abuse

I’m thinking I might retire


Take up another trade

In my old age

Hey, this gun’s for hire


Got a few bullets left

But at least I’m outta debt

So what if my plan backfired?


Sure you can save for a rainy day

Then watch as a typhoon comes your way

You can look around there’s no escape

Right now you are face to face with the wave


Sometimes it’s water and sometimes it’s mud

Sometimes it’s floating debris coming to f*ck you up!

Sometimes it’s earned and sometimes bad luck

Sometimes you jump when you should have ducked!


Time’s up!


SUNDAY MORNING SEX

Where is Noah when you need him?

As the water runs God says,

"We're even!"

Stupid humans now see

What you've done

There's ten feet of mud

That now fills the Garden of Eden





Yeah, you read the book

Never calling the legend a myth

So you never believed

That it would come to this...


With so many false idols

Just who could resist?

Went to church on Sunday

And then became a hypocrite


As you stood on your roof

and you shook your fists

Deceiving in believing

that being blessed

Would be better than this


Oh...someone free me from this misery

Today, not unlike yesterday

Is still not how it should be


There's way too many people

Gazing up at the steeple

Wondering silently

If this whole damn thing ends violently

Yes...once they sought to confide in me

But those days have long gone

They have passed

Maybe I was wrong when I asked:

"If Judas had turned the other cheek

Would he have been slapped?"

Perhaps


I am worse than Judas

And I ain't talking about the priest

'Cause God sorta sees me as a blasphemist

Just because I got another belief...

Repent, repent, repent

I promise I'll never do it again


Now may I go in peace?

Finally I have my freedom

Received relief so to speak

The big guy in the sky

Is the only one to take creed in

Oh sh$%, this hypocrite just told a lie

She just walked on by

And as she batted her eyes

I looked down between my own thighs

And only saw with one eye

I do believe I am gonna die...

Because...


It's the best stuff on earth

But it's not made by Snapple

And to think that Adam

Only settled for an apple

Oops! You dropped your fig leaf Eve

I just heard the voice of God

Say I think it's time for you to leave…




You better leave the garden

Now that you've had your fun

If Eve came from a rib

Then you know where...

The snake came from


BEHAVE

I don’t need to be treated

Like I’m a superstar

I just needed to feel needed

And Honey there you are


Back seat love – can’t beat it

And you’re making it hard

To resist ya - you fine sista

I’d like to break you like the law


Standing looking down at you

Wishing that you were on top of me

You don’t need to say you love me

That’s never been my number one priority


I’m not looking for purity…

On that you can be sure

Maybe it’s just the Magellan in me, baby

That finds the need to explore


Yeah, I used to go buck wild

Back in the day

Then one day my daddy

Took me aside


He said, “Son behave…

Stop thinking like a child

It’s time to act your age…

It’s time to act your age”


SPREADING THE WORD

I just cracked my first beer

But I ain’t much fun

‘til I had about eight more

That’s the only way

I don’t think so clear

As I forget the harsh reality

That this world has in store


I imagine it’s mostly the same

For just about everybody like me

At least that’s what I claim

At least that’s what, so far, I see


The whole world’s going to hell

Because of money, because of technology

Because of greed

And of course it doesn’t help

When you’ve got six billion people

More than you need






Man’s the only animal who takes prisoners

The only species where

Someone can get something for nothing

We’re the only ones who pay taxes for welfare

We’re the only ones who hold

A finger on the button


Darwin was right

About everybody but us

We could use another plague…

We could use another flood

Many secretly agree with what I say

But no one’s willing to board that bus

We could use another world war

So we can spill some more of our blood


Yeah, there’s many who agree

But then say, “What…Who…Me?”

Would rather be sitting on the fence

Than hanging from a tree

No, no, no

They’d never make that big of sacrifice

No, no, no

They’d never take that advice


They only say, “You first!”

To which I respond, “Now that’s absurd!”

“If I was in the back of a hearse

Then there’d be no one left to spread the word.”


TIRED

We sat out in the rain because

We were just so tired of screwing up

A clap of thunder and she didn’t blink

She’s been hit with everything but the kitchen sink


Standing tall when you should have ducked

It’s quickest way to get fucked up

As you’re the one left out in the rain

You think it’s time that maybe you changed


Got caught in the river and its turbulent flow

Got used to things that no woman should know

Got a decision that’s only yours to make

Got a way out… yeah you got an escape


You can go live with your brother

He ain’t been right since mother

Caught her sister in bed with father

Yeah, they were all over each other


They ended up having a daughter

My family tree’s now is a jungle

Rather than face the hot water

They pretended her dad was her uncle


Your brother has a farm in Topeka

And you know he would sure love to see ya

You could stay there and pick up the pieces

Spent some time with the nephews and nieces



ACTRESS

It’s time to write you out of the story

Since most of the lines no longer include me

I don’t want you to be the star of my movie

I’m the wrong writer so why did you choose me?

When you knew you were just gonna use me


I thought I knew which way I was facing

But I was the producer that you were directing

Yet again casting made the wrong selection


But I must say that you were cast

Because your talents were vast

You were the head of your class

It sure helps to look like that:

And oh boy… could you act


You smiled porcelain glass

Leaving an impression that lasts

I find my mind awaken from its nap

Blinking and thinking:

Oh what a fine piece of a$$


It’s time to write you out of the story

Since most of the lines no longer include me

I don’t want you to be the star of my movie

I’m the wrong writer so why did you choose me?

When you knew you were just gonna use me


I thought I knew which way I was facing

But I was the producer that you were directing

Yet again casting made the wrong selection


EMPTY ROOM

You live in a box

You build your walls

And when you stand up

You seem so tall


That's just because

You're in an empty room

But it's not your fault

So, I don't blame you


When you philosophize

amongst the dead

I could imagine the conversations

Going on in your head


Of course they're mostly

centered around either him or her

Or you and me...

Never talk about Bolivia,

East Timor or the Middle East


Can't sing about the hypocritical

Some listeners might get pissed

Better to deal in the trivial,

agreeable and bliss...




Stick to matters of the heart

Tell them what they want to hear

Lull them to sleep with art

The best paid musicians are magicians

That can make the bad things disappear