(22/35) WHAT TOM WANTS
Let’s be direct about this. After 29 years of writing, 434 songs, 120 recordings, and a catalog that covers everything a human being can feel, think, rage about, grieve, laugh at, and screw up — here is what Tom Jensen actually wants.
(1.) A Live Venue
A physical space — a bar, a coffeehouse, a music room — where musicians come to make songs in real time with a live audience and an online community participating through a moderator. A place where the lottery tickets get scratched in public. Four nights a week. This is the entire engine. Everything else is built around this.
(2.) A CEO with Connections
Someone with operational skills who can build and run this thing while Tom focuses on creative decisions. Can make things happen. Takes the liability. Finds the venue. Raises or brings capital. Builds the team. Is the face. Handles the citizenship requirement. Manages the chaos. Tom wants to be Tony Soprano — he only talks to Sal, and Sal tells everyone what to do. Ideally someone with talent and looks who can front the project while Tom sits in the back and writes the next thing.
(3.) Citizenship / Green Card for One Specific Essential Person
TOP OF THE LIST. ;) Tom will follow this person to whatever country they end up in. The project goes where they go. Tony Soprano style if that is what it takes — lawyers, sponsors, immigration experts, connections. The CEO’s job includes figuring this out. If they cannot or will not, Tom takes the project elsewhere. This is how non-negotiable it is.
(4.) A Handler / Moderator
Someone who can bring out his best side in the room. The emcee. The face of the live shows. The person who interfaces with the audience while Tom stays directly involved without being out front. Think Sal. Think gorgeous Ricky Martin type or hot little blonde. Somebody with talent AND looks who makes the room work while Tom scratches lottery tickets in the back.
(5.) Healthcare
$1,000 per month. Non-negotiable. He currently has coverage through the state of Maine but does not want to do this project in Maine. If he takes full-time employment out of state he loses Maine coverage. The project must cover this or fund him to buy his own plan. This is a condition of participation, not a negotiating point.
(6.) A Weekly Salary and Sign-On Bonus
Recognition that 29 years of work has value that has never been monetized. A percentage of live appearance revenue — 10% is the starting point. Nothing unreasonable. Everything earned. He has been poor by choice for long enough.
(7.) An App
Tracks every contributor, every contribution, every song. Splits revenue automatically and transparently. Community hub where collaborations begin and songs get discovered. Estimated $50,000–$100,000 to build, three to six months. Can launch with manual tracking as a minimum viable product and build the full app alongside the live shows.
(8.) Musicians, Singers, and Believers
People who hear something in these words and want to be the ones who bring them to life. Also: other lyricists and catalog owners who want to merge their catalogs with his to build something larger than either one alone. The potential for other people to join their catalogs with his is real and largely unexplored.
(9.) The 35th Album Sold to the Highest Bidder
The first 34 albums are the loss leader. The 35th is where the real money comes from. Tom has not written it yet. He has not given it away. And he will not. After the first 34 albums make his name ubiquitous, the bidding begins. He retains writer credit and future rights. The check better be big. And it better clear.
(10.) Improv Songwriting Nights
Whose Line Is It Anyway but for music. Give two or three musicians 20 minutes on a topic. Go around the circle, one person does the first line, the next does the second. Upgrade poem nights using B and C material to make something A-level. Funny original songs. Parodies. Political satires. Once you get Tom and some talented people in the same room, you could do anything. He did all of this by himself. Imagine with ten people who are actually good at what they do.
(11.) The World to Hear Lady Weaver’s Music
She was the greatest musician Tom ever encountered — full stop. One album worth of music that is all amazing, all timeless, all proof of a talent that comes along once in a generation. When she passed, something enormous left this world quietly and without nearly enough notice. The entire free-lyric, blockchain, profit-from-the-bottom-up idea was cemented in her honor. If one thing comes from all of this, let it be that the world finally hears her music.
(12.) No Corporate or Shareholder Ownership
The venue and the project cannot be owned by a corporation with shareholders. No private equity. No board of directors. No one primarily motivated by quarterly earnings reports. Tom has spent 29 years critiquing the system. He does not want to become it.
(13.) Accessible Pricing for Fans
Not $5,000 top seats. The horizontal model means tickets run from free to $100 at the high end. The goal is 10,000 people at $10, not 100 people at $1,000. Mass participation over elite exclusivity. The door stays open. That is the whole point.
(14.) To Be with Fans — Not Famous
Comfortable being around people who love the work. Not looking to be on magazine covers or morning shows. Jimmy Kimmel was great on The Man Show and became completely useless the moment he went mainstream — everybody knows that. That is the cautionary tale. Credibility is the whole ballgame. The second you go full mainstream you start serving a different master and the work suffers for it.
(15.) Maximum Revenue Streams — Non-Exploitative
Key. Key. Key. The moment this goes Bill Burr WWE corporate, or Akaash Singh getting cucked trying to be everywhere, or ChatGPT open-source-for-the-people implosion — it’s over. The model is A.J. Gentile, Hecklefish, The Why Files — build a fan base that is genuinely loved and genuinely loves back, and the revenue follows naturally from that trust rather than being extracted from it. There are a ton of ways to make fans happy and help the project at the same time. That is the only version worth building.
(16.) His Archive of Handwritten Originals Preserved
A box of handwritten material going back 20-plus years. Original copies, handwritten, from over the last 29 years of writing. If this ever blows up, that archive becomes memorabilia — auction items, collector pieces, historical artifacts. He knows the box exists somewhere. Worth finding before it gets lost again.
(17.) Limited Liability
LLC or similar structure. Tom as employee or contractor, not owner or manager. Personal assets protected. Exposure limited to salary and revenue percentage. He wants to be the crazy artist the CEO manages and protects — not the responsible one holding the bag when things get complicated.
(18.) To Start Dating Women Again
His words. With a wink. In the official C3 section of Book Two. On the list. Always will be.
(19.) — To Be Announced —
The lottery tickets are sitting there. Four hundred thirty-four of them.
Most have never been scratched.
Who wants to scratch a ticket with Tom before his decade runs out?
collaborhythmtom@gmail.com — (978) 595-3497 — collabtunes.com